> Improvised Smelly Device Detonated--One Caught in Blast
February 23, 2006

Washington—In a bold attack, insurgents breached tight security at a Salem residence to detonate an improvised smelly device (ISD). Fortunately, the attack took place in the early hours of the day, so casualties and injuries were kept to a minimum. Injured in the attack was Luna, a one-year-old mixed breed puppy, and a member of an elite fighting force known as the Roast Beef Bomb-Busters.

Artist's rendering of an image caught on security cameras near the blast.

“I was out to patrol the perimeter, as I do every morning, when suddenly I sensed that something wasn’t right,” says Luna. “The attack happened so fast, I didn’t even know what happened,” she adds. Her combat training failed her, and rather than apprehending the perpetrators, Luna ran for cover.

In fact, if it wasn’t for a Security Forces artist’s recreation of a blurry image caught on a security camera, the identity of the attackers might still be unknown.

“The deployment of an ISD is not uncommon for this particular group of terrorists,” says an unnamed source in the Pentagon (note: it’s not that he didn’t want his name included in the article, his parents never actually named him). The source went on to say that bio-active warfare is their trademark.

“They will try to strike again,” he warns.

So while the repercussions of this attack will surely be felt for years to come, for now, the only thing the affected parties can do is to try to remove the ISD bio-active residue via any means possible.

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